Why won't companies talk to their customers?

This week's Marketeer: Herald Sun, 15 May 2010

It started when I discovered that Big Pond were blocking my emails. You see I send regular newsletters to a few hundred of my clients and prospects - as any good business should. But every time my email program sent 20 out, the rest failed.

When I investigated, it turned out that Big Pond, my provider, does not allow you to send out more than about 20 emails every 10 minutes. So I’d have to continually re-start the program, 20 emails at a time.

I called their offices to see if there was any way around this problem - and ended up in Manila, I think. I was politely told, “We cannot change that, it is policy.”

So let’s tackle the policy. “I want to speak with Big Pond Management,” I said. “Sorry sir but you can’t speak to management,” the supervisor replied.

After a couple of hours it was clear that there was no way I could talk to someone in Big Pond about their policy - because their policy is not to talk to customers.

Then I wanted to ask my branch of the NAB about a new cheque book. I plunged into the world of cloying robots: “Thank you for your call” and “To check your balance press 2" and dozens of other menu choices, through voice recognition which could not recognise: “I want to speak to my branch”.

Somehow after five minutes I reached a human. And she found me in a surly mood. I think I scared her into putting me through. The branch conversation was great - the teller knew me, checked my account, arranged for the cheque book. I asked if she could save all this angst and just give me their phone number. “I’m sorry Mr Beatty, we can’t give our number out.” “Why not?” “It’s policy.”

I decided to survey just how many companies refuse to talk to their customers. With Woolworths it took a lot of robot barriers but I finally found a human. No she could not put me through to the marketing manager. Nor to anyone in the management team.

I deliberately did not say I was from the press. I wanted them to think I was a customer who needed to talk to someone in management. I discovered the marketing manager’s name is Lew Dunkeley. Could I speak to him or his secretary? “Sorry sir, policies and procedures do not allow me to put you through.” Why not? “Because you are a customer.”

I tried other companies with varying success. But nowhere could I reach anyone senior - except, actually, Intel. They had a receptionist who put me through to their Melbourne manager.

At Fosters I reached a Brand Communications Manager. What did that mean? “Well it’s mostly PR but from time to time I get customer relations calls from the punters.”

Qantas passed me as far as the marketing manager’s secretary, while Telstra has a “Contact the office of the CEO” email link.

I could go on but these are good examples of what happens when you try to talk with corporate managers. Yes they are busy men and women and can’t be bothered by every Tom or Tammy who wants to bend their ears. But building corporate walls is not an answer.

This lack of contact leaves them just talking to each other up on the 20th floor, and a growth of myths and theories instead of reality. It’s a recipe for big errors and monumental incompetence.

I’ve long thought it would be a good corporate habit for executives to take just one short call a day, at random, from the public ringing in. Just to remind them that customers are real people - and that they would not have a job without them.

Ray@ebeatty.com

Blogs Away!

Welcome to my blog!

Despite 27 years on computers, I've resisted blogs and tweets, muttering "I haven't got time". But finally my mate Winston Marsh shamed me into it: "Come on Ray, this is 2010, you've got to keep up with where the world's going!"

So I thought, OK, turn over a new page - I'm gonna Blog and Tweet and Twitter and get out into the world that way.

Mostly I will post some of the hundreds of weekly columns I have written as The Marketeer in the Melbourne Herald Sun. It has a million and a half readers every day but maybe you are not one of them. So here's your chance to catch up with me if ever you wish.

Check the title list on the left and pick one that takes your fancy.

* Cheers - Ray *